Know your no.

Stop swallowing the answers.

I don’t like this.

The person I spend the most time with is two years old. I tend to the soil she grows in, so that she may blossom exactly as she is designed to. We are not friends, but she is my best little buddy, and we learn a lot from each other.

She is currently learning how to talk in sentences and has started saying “I don’t like this” extremely often. Which is so damn healthy! (If you don’t know your no, can you know your yes?) 

What she does and does not like changes on a minutely basis. A frequent example — she’ll be happily eating (red) grapes, then abruptly push them away with a scowl and proclaim, “I no like this.” Clear and simple, no more, body is done. (We’ve been talking about the difference between not wanting and not liking something, and how you can like or want things sometimes but not necessarily all the time).

Not anymore, not right now. Nooooo. I don’t like that, not for me. Not a big deal, just a no. Nuh-uh, no way, absolutely not !

(Wouldn’t the world have a lot fewer problems if everyone was taught to respect the somatic no).

P absorbs and repeats everything she hears — she keeps me incredibly conscious of the words I use around her and the way I say them.

Even if you’re not a toddler, your brain is a sponge, and what you listen to affects your thoughts & beliefs & health. If we aren’t mindful about what we consume, all the default, often toxic, input can build up and smother our internal guidance. Then, we don’t even know our true yes/no’s because they are buried beneath conditioned clutter from sources that aren’t rooted in love.

All of the answers we need for right now are here, now.

Yes, the patterns and beliefs that were baked and cooled into you from ages 0-14 are particularly formative. Luckily, there is neuroplasticity — brains are responsive and malleable. We can still update our neural pathways, and we start by paying attention to what we think, believe, and do. Awakening to the ridiculous, established thought loops that keep us trapped in misaligned mediocrity lets us work to alter these patterns and live more in alignment with the things we are meant for. If you can hear the ‘I don’t like that’ or ‘yes I want that’ from within, listen — this is your ticket, these are your answers.

The cost of ignoring the ‘I don’t like that’ or ‘yes I want that’ is the potential of living our freest and brightest lives. Ignoring the body’s wisdom will at best land you a flat and boring life (yikes, & gets worse from there). Don’t sacrifice your agency to satisfy the unimaginative opinions of fearful people.

Eventually, I want to respect my no so much that it doesn’t matter if I’m saying no to an objectively fun time or to a bowl of grapes. Sometimes, it’s just, not for me.

¯\_(ツ)_/¯

xx, maggie

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