The Aware Witness
The mind is just so good at pretending it’s you.
Sometimes, I hate my thoughts: they’re endlessly negative or despairing; fueled by plain fear, shrouded in the illusion of protection. It’s distressing to notice how awful my mind is to me; it feels even worse to realize that I’m actually listening to it.
In these moments where I’m both seeing and hating my thoughts, there isn’t really much I can do to stop the stream. The more I think about how distressed I am, the worse it gets—thoughts don’t stop by thinking about stopping them. The only thing to do, really, is to witness what’s going on inside.
To become the mindful witness of your own inner world, Tara Brach teaches this simple two-question practice:
“What is happening inside me right now?”
“Can I let it be?” 1
The mind is so good at pretending it’s you; this makes it easy to remain oblivious to its neurotic chatter. It can sound just like you. Only by becoming aware of your mental narrative, though, can you realize that what you can hear in your head is very much not you at all. You are the one who sees the drama of what’s happening; remembering this can keep you from getting lost in the storm.
. .
If I’ve learned anything through swimming in the self-development world for all these years, it’s that true inner work does not come through sheer force of will or frantic implementation of practices. Willing negative thoughts to cease, or trying to distract bad habits away, will never do as much good work as shining the pure light of awareness upon those dark and unpleasant things within us. So often, awareness is all we need for what’s tight to loosen up. Awareness both yields to kindness and induces agency: when we can see what’s happening, we can make different, kinder choices.
Perhaps the first—and maybe only—thing to do when faced with something hard is to watch it unfold. Let the witness observe. It might be that you can later do something to overcome it, but it might also be that watching the problem is all that’s needed. Simply observing what feels difficult can allow it the space to resolve, all on its own, with the least resistance. It’s amazing what a little light of awareness can do.
The more you practice watching your mind instead of participating in its drama, the easier it may be to sense that place of eternal kindness within you, that place where the witness sits.
Notice what’s happening inside you. See if you can let it be.
Maggie
From Buddhist meditation teacher Tara Brach’s recent talk: The Superpower of Mindful Witnessing