When We Consume Too Much From a Place of Not Enough

The answer (always) lies in the Here & Nowness of it all.

I’ve been feeling thoroughly exhausted from online content lately, and consequently decreasing my input. I’m deleting most of my emails, logging off my social media feed, and enjoying the space my mind has without a constant stream of podcasts or news. Only in the absence have I realized just how much I was taking in on a daily basis. I feel engaged in other areas of my life, which feels like I’m doing at least something right, and have again arrived at the realization that less online media means a better, more interesting life for me.

Anyone else in this spot?

In the right amount, content—news, entertainment, and otherwise—is good, constructive, beneficial. But wow, how quickly we can get lost in too much of it.

Ram Dass has a quote in his book Be Here Now that applies succinctly to the mild-to-moderate-to-severe digital dependency so many of us face. Frankly, it applies to any kind of dependency—feel free to sub in your own.

He says this:

“If we’re not in the here & now / 
no matter how much food we put in our bellies / 
it’s never going to be enough / 
and that’s the feeling of western man / 
it’s not enough /
he’s got it all going in / 
as fast as he can shovel it /
he’s got every sensual gratification he can possibly desire / 
and it’s not enough /
because there’s no here & nowness about it.” 

¹

That’s it, right? If we’re not really present, nothing we ingest on autopilot will really satisfy us. This is true of food, unnecessary products we buy, online content, even people. It’s true of anything we become accustomed to consuming without a sense of presence: we keep going back for more, when we know it’s not satisfying what we actually need.

It’s ironic that we get lost in too much of something when we actually feel that it isn’t enough. We indulge too much in things when we feel lacking, and especially, when we are not present: when there’s no ‘here and nowness’, as Ram Dass would say. We buy too much stuff when we’re feeling disconnected or are in some kind of deficit. We scroll for too long, read too many articles about the same thing, consult too many influencers, because we’re hungry for something—real connection, perhaps? A sense of satisfaction? But it isn’t enough to fulfill us.

A few days ago, my professor asked my class a question in this similar vein: why are we so tuned into each other 24/7, via social media and messaging and location tracking? The general consensus my class arrived to is this: we are seeking connection. We’re desperate for it, in fact, and struggling to find it. Thus, we substitute handfuls of artificial connection to try and satisfy the longing for something more real. Hence, anxiously tracking people and checking in on what they’re doing via their social media ‘story’ updates. The younger we are, the more we are susceptible to this, but even people who are older-than-teenagers do this, too. We’re going about connection without a sense of presence, and it isn’t working. As convenient and occasionally beneficial online connection can be, our longing for authentic relationships will never be satisfied with the artificiality of online interactions. It isn’t enough. And we’re using it too much.

Subbing online media consumption for authentic connection is like eating fast food for every meal: it’ll feed you, and it tastes good for a second, but eventually, it isn’t enough for your body to be actually satisfied. Eventually, you crave something real, organic, fresh—and you’ve got to fulfill that craving.

Be here now

Can you sense when you’ve had enough? Can you tell when you’re consuming too much? Reaching for connection in places you’ll never really find it?

When you’re scrolling or ‘adding to cart’ or commenting on stranger’s posts—are you trying to satisfy something that cannot be satisfied where you’re trying to get it?

Questions to consider.

Of course, there is nothing innately wrong with content. It’s how we learn, stay entertained, know things. But when we engage with any sort of content without any kind of soft presence or here & nowness, we risk losing ourselves. We risk never being satisfied: We can’t be satisfied, if we’re consuming too much from a place of not enough.

It’s aggravating and relieving that the way forward is almost always simple and present-moment focused. Whenever you become swept up in content, news, checking up on other people’s opinions or lives—try infusing a little bit of awareness into that moment. Come back to the here & nowness of it all; feel your breath; let your jaw slacken. Notice the sense of not-enoughness that pulses in you, and let it go. There’s actually plenty, right here.

Inviting presence and awareness into your engagement with consumption frees up space. It decreases the pressure to act now, buy something now, eat it now. Presence alleviates the urge to keep moving from not-enoughness, because presence knows that not-enoughness will never satisfy you. Maybe plenty, right here will serve you better instead.

Maggie

P.s. You can now listen to me read these posts each week! Click “article voiceover” at the top of the page. I am no audio producer, so please excuse the quality.

1. The format of this quote is impossible to mimic because of the uniquely dynamic and illustrative format of the book Be Here Now. If you’ve never read it, it’ll surprise you.